Have you ever heard a joke or story that implied that Macintosh users were stupid? They’re not, but sometimes they make it hard to know that for sure.

Here is an actual Support Article on Apple’s web site.

How to pick up and carry your iMac G5

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Don’t know how to pick up and carry your iMac G5? It’s easy.

Before moving your computer, make sure all cables and cords are disconnected.

Pick up the iMac G5 by grasping both sides of the computer. Carry it to wherever you wish.

Ohhh! And here I was trying to pick it up with my teeth.

This was the first ever Conversantion Enhancement concept, but it never made it to the site… Until now!

Dreaded Poo Coodies

Used in a sentence:
I always flush public toilets with my foot because of the dreaded poo coodies.

Fox News reports that Nicole Kidman’s new movie “Birth” is causing a real stir.

The premise of the show is that Kidman’s dead husband is reincarnated and comes to visit her as a 10-year-old boy. Okay, weird, but certainly within the scope for Hollywood.

The problems arrise when the 37-year-old “rekindles” her relationship with her husband, played by 11-year-old Cameron Bright. This includes some “tender” kissing and a nude bath scene. Eeeeew.

The film was actually booed at the Venice International Film Festival (See, I knew Italians where good people.) and several religious groups (including my Sunday school class) are asking for upstanding folks to boycott this film. This will, of course, cause more people to go see it, but those people aren’t the upstanding ones, now are they?

Personally, I’m boycotting this film. True, that would be like me boycotting space travel or eating cottage cheese (both things I would not normally do anyway), but it’s the principle that matters.

This just in, China thinks we are too big for our britches. Reuters quotes a Chinese official saying that the problems facing America are due to the “Bush doctrine” of “arrogance and cocksureness.” (Can you say cocksureness in a PG rated blog?!)

“The current U.S. predicament in Iraq serves as another example that when a country’s superiority psychology inflates beyond its real capability, a lot of trouble can be caused”

(Excuse me while I chortle. China is always good for a laugh.)

So, I guess that displacing a few million people to build the worlds biggest disaster… er… dam (which incidentally, has a long list of serious problems) would not be seen as cocksureness in the superiority psychology inflated eyes of the Chinese government.

Courtecy of Randy-Pants, your Conversation Enhancement of the Day:

Uneat

Used in a sentence:
My wife threatened to uneat her dinner if I continued to talk about coughing a bit of potato out of my nose.

Oh yes, there is a real live story behind that.