Hey, pal, do you have any idea who I think I am?

Yeah. I think I met that guy.

I have had an epiphany.

There is this thing I heard about that I think could well change my life. It’s called “priorizisition” or something like that. Basically it means, “Do important stuff and don’t do unimportant stuff.” It’s pretty ground breaking and, I think if this catches on, the world could really be a better place.

The epiphany is this: I can get things done that are actually beneficial and and productive and can improve my life and the lives around me. But to do so, I must stop doing the unimportant, meaningless, and time-consuming things that fill my life now. I do not have to watch every sci-fi or comedy movie franchise or TV series, in order of release, just because NetFlix recommends it to me. (Take that “Strong Bad’s Emails: Discs 1 -4!”) I do not have to eat every SweeTart in the movie-theater-sized box that I bought (just because it was on sale), carefully choosing the color I eat to maintain an equal color ratio among the remaining pieces. I do not have to listen to the songs in my iTunes playlist sorted by number of plays so that no song feels superior to the others and no song feels left out.

Shocking, I know!

I just finished pruning my NetFlix queue from 498 down to 336. I feel so free! Inspired!! I also deleted the spreadsheet where I tracked the episodes of “Sliders” that had and had not seen. (I still have the spreadsheets for “King of the Hill” and “Big Bang Theory.” Baby steps, you know? [And, yes, I am serious. These spreadsheets actually exist.])

So anyway. Now, all I have to do to turn my life around and change the world is overcome my overwhelming compulsions to do all these pointless things and to somehow replace them with overwhelming compulsions to do productive things like teaching myself Ruby on Rails (It’s a computer programming language, Dad. Yes, like the punch cards you used in college, except it’s for the inter-webs.) And finishing my curriculum on Revelation so I can actually teach it to people who want to understand Revelation. And getting my lawn to have green grass and dead weeds instead of the other way around. Cuz that right there would make the world a better place, I tell you whut!

I’m starting out on a new project. I’m going to learn Ruby on Rails. No, it doesn’t have anything to do with trains or geology. It’s the latest greatest programming language for the web. Rails is quickly replacing Perl and PHP has the go-to web language and I need to get on board. Frankly, I’m several years behind the trend, so I’ve got catching up to do.

Speaking of Perl (the first “web” language I learned) here’s a great white board quip from RandyPants.

Perl is a funky language.  It’s like duct tape and velcro had a baby.
– RandyPants

I complain a lot. I mean, I’m generally a happy person. I wouldn’t say I’m crabby or overly contrary. But I do complain more than I should.

One of the things I complain about too much is the weather. I grew up in Amarillo with, very likely the worst weather in the world. In Amarillo you get scorching Texas summers; well above 100 with hot, dry, hair-dryer-in-your-face wind. You get bone-chilling winters; wind chills well below zero with dry, stinging, blowing snow drifting in feet, not inches. And in between you don’t get spring or fall. You get tornadoes and hail. Oh yeah, and wind. Seriously, the trees grow leaning north east. Honest.

From Amarillo, I moved to Colorado Springs. Now, the Springs has unusual weather for Colorado. It’s tucked right up against the mountains, so it doesn’t get all that much snow. Actually the weather in the Springs is very much like Amarillo. The big difference is the scenery!

Colorado Springs does at least have Spring. Spring is when you scrape the ice off your windows before you drive to work, and turn your A/C on high on your way home. When the spring rains come to Colorado Springs you can see them coming down the slopes of Pike’s Peak. It’s gorgeous!

Now I live in “North Texas” which, if you look at a map, is actually East Texas, but  you can’t call it that for some reason. *shrug* The weather here is really not as bad as I make it out to be. It’s hot, yes. Ugly hot. Nasty, sticky hot. From April through September. I could survive in Amarillo driving without A/C because it was so dry. I never really sweat in Amarillo, even toiling on the horse ranch, shoveling mountains of poo in the hot sun. But here, I sweat sitting in the car. Blech!

And North Texas doesn’t really get winter as I know it. I complain (too much) about not getting real snow. Yes, it gets kind of cold, but it just doesn’t snow. So you get all the misery with none of the fun.

If we do get anything, it’s ice. Ice is no fun. You can’t go out and play in the ice. But even when we get an ice storm here, it’s over in a couple of days. The sun comes out and it’s gone.

But then, last year, we got real snow! Eleven inches of perfect snow. Just wet enough to make massive snowmen. And in a couple of days it was gone, the streets were clear and it was back to life as usual. It was great!

Now, in 2011, it seemed like the whole country was getting snow except us. So much snow that they were all sick of it, a notion that is very foreign to me. I love snow!! I love to play in it. I love to drive in it. (Driving in good, wet snow is a lot like racing dirt track, which I also loved.)

Then, it happened. The big one. THE storm. We got our usual, big, nasty ice storm. Freezing rain and sleet that packed down into a deadly ice pack. But this time it’s different. It iced late Monday night. And Tuesday afternoon the sun came out and melted it all, right? WRONG!! Tuesday: highs in the 20’s, single-digit lows. Wednesday: highs in the 20’s, single-digit lows. Thursday: highs in the 20’s, single-digit lows. Friday… Finally something different. Friday: high in the 20’s and snow! Wait, what? Snow?! Yes! Lovely, fluffy, beautify snow. Great! Let’s go play!! Noooo. Because that lovely snow is covering that same inch of deadly ice, only now, you can’t see the dry spots. You can’t weave your way through and avoid the slips and slides. BAH!!

Four days. Four days with no school, no work, just sit in the house watching TV and trying to stay warm. And the big warm up, the promised 50 degree, sunny weekend to clear away the ice and snow? LIES! ALL LIES!! Now they’re saying we’ll finally get above freezing, but only a little and only in the afternoons, for the next several days, maybe a week. Will this madness ever end?!

So, remember all those times I scoffed at the North Texas weather? Remember all those times I said, “I miss real winter. I miss real snow.” I take it back. I take it all back. Please please let me get out of this house!!

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Lest you fall for the lie that the Planned Murderhood exposure is an isolated incident, here’s another. This one is not nearly as dramatic or sensational, but it is quite plain that the counselor is quietly overlooking underage sex slaves and giving advice to their pimp to circumvent the law.

The money shot, as far as I’m concerned is, “We do ’em once or twice a month here.” That is, performing abortions on minors without parental consent, avoiding VA law and potentially covering up sex crimes.

You may find this video shocking. You shouldn’t.

You should know (especially since I’ve told you before over and over and over and over) that Planned Murderhood is a despicable organization staffed with the lowest forms of life that God allows to exist. And here’s the kicker: You’re paying for it. Over $300 million dollars a year of your money keeps Planned Murderhood in business. Contact your U.S. Representative today and demand that Planned Murderhood be federally defunded… that is, unless you want to continue spending your tax dollars to give business advice to pimps with 13-year-old sex slaves.

There are a couple of silver linings on this story.

First, Planned Murderhood fired this manager in a cloud of feigned shock.

Second, the Lamestream Media has finally been forced to come out against their longtime ally (also in a cloud of feigned shock). Maybe we can finally get enough traction to pull their funding for good.