Heaven help us! What has the world come to?

These two evil vixens, Taylor and Lindsey (such insidious names), were found guilty this week of scaring the wits out of a peaceful law abiding citizen of Durango, Colorado, with … cookies.

That’s right! Cookies! Those most frightening of all baked goods. Last July, “The T and L Club”, as they are referred to in ubber-villain circles, asked their parents if they could bake cookies for their neighbors after their chores were done, rather than go to a school dance where they might encounter “cursing and drinking”. A likely story!! With their parent’s consent, this terrible twosome baked batches of chocolate-chip and sugar cookies and packages them in small tins decorated with red and pink hearts! OH THE HUMANITY!!

But fear not, good citizens, because justice has been dealt. One of their victims had the nerve to bring them to justice. That’s right! Wantia Renea Young, 49, filed suit against the girls to pay for her medical bills, as well as pain and suffering, when she ended up in the hospital after suffering a “severe anxiety attack”. It seems that when the girls knocked on Mrs. Young’s door to drop of the cookies at 10:30 PM, she mistook them for the boogie man, or some other imaginary foe, and her heart just couldn’t take it.

She was awarded $900 to cover the cost of her E.R. visit, but was not paid for her pain nor her suffering. “The victory wasn’t sweet,” she said. But apparently the cookies were.

Wanita said that she believes that the girls should not have been running from door to door late at night. “Something bad could have happened to them.” Indeed. They could lose $900 to some… well… bad person.

If you’d like to call and thank Mrs. Young for protecting us all from the evil of sugary pastries, her home phone number is (970) 259-6130. (I luvs me some information super-highway.)

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