I’ve got several big projects going at the house and they all have some dependence on each other. I have not been clear headed enough to really organize them into a workable plan yet and yet they are all, in some way, in progress. So, what I really need is a plan, which reminds me of this quip from Moss.

A plan? Let me put on my slightly larger glasses.
– Moss (IT Crowd)

For some reason, I tend to view the world through complex metaphors. Remember back when I compared the three most popular operating systems with cars? Yeah. That was great.

…

Oh, right. Sorry. I got lost in the glow of my own cleverness for a second there. Aaaanyway. Another, similar analogy occurred to me a while back.

You know how uptight I can get about language. And you know I have no love lost on Microsoft. It occurred to me that my angst for both has the same root cause.

Yes, the English Language is just like Microsoft. I shall elaborate.

For the world of computers to really work, you must have some kind of standards. Hardware and software engineers must come together and agree on some basic rules in order for things to work. If I’m designing a PC, I need to know for certain how the operating system is going to use my memory and processor. If I’m designing an operating system, I have to know for certain how the memory and processor work. If I’m going to create a web browser, like Firefox or Chrome, I must know for certain how the HTML or Flash or image should look when I display it.

The only way to know these things for certain is if the parties involved get together and decide on some rules. We call these “standards” and we call stuff that follows said standards “standard compliant.”

Naturally, Microsoft is involved in almost every standard debate that comes along. They stand right there with everyone else and nod happily. “Yes! We wholeheartedly agree! The HTML box model should work just like you said.” “Oh, yes. Cascading Style Sheets should be handled exactly like that. Mm hmm!”

But then, a few months later, without fail, Microsoft releases some massive software package that ignores, or worse, “improves upon” the standard they just agreed to! AACK!!

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “Hey, smarty pants, you just ended that sentence with a preposition!” Well, bully for you. I sure did. But, that’s because I’m using English and English, just like Microsoft, loves to make rules that everyone accepts as gospel, and them break them for no particular reason at all!

We all learned in school that you shouldn’t end with a preposition. But, as it turns out, that rule is bunk! And don’t even get me started on “i before e.” Someone really should rein in that weird rule!

When I met a group of Europeans from various countries, I asked them what language should I learn if I plan to visit. What language do most people speak across Europe? French? German? Spanish? Nope. They agreed. It’s English. So, just like Microsoft, English is slowly taking over the world, with it’s rules all meant to be broken. AACK!!

The push to defund Planned Murderhood has kicked their PR team into high gear. And when Planned Murderhood’s PR gets going, the poo gets deep fast. Don’t fall for the lies.

DefundPlannedParenthood.org

If you want to bone up on your geek score, here’s a little history lesson. Study it well so you can drop a little net knowledge in your next conversation and sound like you actually have some geek cred.

(Incidentally, I got my first internet ready PC in 1995. So that tells you at what point I entered the game.)

Image Link

We’re back!

It’s surprising how much you yearn for normalcy when you are forced to go without it for a couple of weeks. And there’s nothing like a death in your immediate circle of friends and family to rattle your perspective. So this week’s white board quip is not nearly as original or clever as usual, but it certainly is true and very much in the front of my mind this week.

Don’t take life too seriously. No one makes it out alive.

Sorry for letting my blog stagnate. There’s been much news on the home front. Rather than fuss with copying and pasting, I’ll just link over to my Mom’s blog.

March 8 – The Home Stretch

March 10 – Waiting

March 12 – Free At Last

Thanks to everyone who prayed, cared, and commented. I’ll still be in La Grange for the next week. Maybe life will regain some normalcy after that.

Today, March 2nd, is Texas Independence Day. Happy 175th birthday, Texas!!

Now, go buy some fireworks and picnic makings and enjoy your day off.

Wait, what? We don’t get the day off? Wha… Why not?! *grumble grumble*

Hey, pal, do you have any idea who I think I am?

Yeah. I think I met that guy.

I have had an epiphany.

There is this thing I heard about that I think could well change my life. It’s called “priorizisition” or something like that. Basically it means, “Do important stuff and don’t do unimportant stuff.” It’s pretty ground breaking and, I think if this catches on, the world could really be a better place.

The epiphany is this: I can get things done that are actually beneficial and and productive and can improve my life and the lives around me. But to do so, I must stop doing the unimportant, meaningless, and time-consuming things that fill my life now. I do not have to watch every sci-fi or comedy movie franchise or TV series, in order of release, just because NetFlix recommends it to me. (Take that “Strong Bad’s Emails: Discs 1 -4!”) I do not have to eat every SweeTart in the movie-theater-sized box that I bought (just because it was on sale), carefully choosing the color I eat to maintain an equal color ratio among the remaining pieces. I do not have to listen to the songs in my iTunes playlist sorted by number of plays so that no song feels superior to the others and no song feels left out.

Shocking, I know!

I just finished pruning my NetFlix queue from 498 down to 336. I feel so free! Inspired!! I also deleted the spreadsheet where I tracked the episodes of “Sliders” that had and had not seen. (I still have the spreadsheets for “King of the Hill” and “Big Bang Theory.” Baby steps, you know? [And, yes, I am serious. These spreadsheets actually exist.])

So anyway. Now, all I have to do to turn my life around and change the world is overcome my overwhelming compulsions to do all these pointless things and to somehow replace them with overwhelming compulsions to do productive things like teaching myself Ruby on Rails (It’s a computer programming language, Dad. Yes, like the punch cards you used in college, except it’s for the inter-webs.) And finishing my curriculum on Revelation so I can actually teach it to people who want to understand Revelation. And getting my lawn to have green grass and dead weeds instead of the other way around. Cuz that right there would make the world a better place, I tell you whut!