Don’t we look tough?! I finally got time to dump the pictures off our camera. This is Tammy and I all decked out for a ride on Thumper.
You can read all about Thumper in this previous post. Since then, I have installed the Clarke 4.7 gallon plastic fuel tank, to replace the dinky stock 2.8 gallon metal tank. I’ve created a new blog page to post my work on Thumper (including the gas tank install) if anyone is interested.
Thank goodness for Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid and their buddies in Congress. We can all rest easier tonight knowing that they are working hard to save our country.
Recently, they past a bill that is so important that it that it was brought to the floor even though Congress is too busy to approve the 2011 budget until after the first week of November. (Now, wasn’t there something important about this November? Gee, I can’t remember.)
And what is this super important, earth shaking, universe altering law? The law requires that in any existing federal laws, the term “mentally retarded” must be replaced with “an individual with an intellectual disability.” Can I get a, “Amen!”And please raise my taxes to pay the legal clerks dug through mountains of legislation in order to carry this out!! Cuz it’s that important.
I am so proud to be an American, and can’t wait to exercise my right to vote out these “individuals with intellectual disabilities” currently in office.
[Actually, I don’t have that right, because all three of the Right–Wing–Conservative crazy Republicans that represent me are doing their level best to stop the maddness.]
I continue to struggle with some back pain. It’s not debilitating, but it sure is irritating. I’ve pulled back muscles before, but after a day or two of rest, I was able to get back to normal life. But I guess I was younger then. Not so now.
So, in honor of realizing my mortality, I offer this week’s white board quip.
I intend to live forever – so far, so good. -Steven Wright
I’ve never liked McDonald’s. It makes my mouth feel greasy. It makes my stomach feel heavy. It doesn’t taste quite right. There’s just something wrong about it.
When I saw “Super Size Me” a couple of years ago, I didn’t really see it as an attack on Mickey D’s. It did opened my eyes to American food trends in general: Out-of-control serving sizes, massive amounts of calories, sugar, and fat. And certainly McD’s has let the charge. But is there more to it than 44 oz. Cokes and too much salt?
I just found out about several studies into McDonald’s food shelf life. Clicky clicky to see a happy meal that has set out in the open for over a year. Not only has it not decomposed. It has not drawn any pests. Even ants and mice agree that McD’s is gross. The video below shows a four year old happy meal that looks nearly as good as the day it was served (compared to a three month old potato that does not). And here is a whopping 12-year-old McD’s hamburger.
And now, for the craziest of the crazies: A “Burger Museum” featuring McDonald’s sandwiches from every year since 1989. How about a nice, clean, decay free 18 year old hamburger? Sound yummy? No, I didn’t think so.
Here’s another story that should be all over the news but isn’t.
The crack-pot who stormed Discovery Channel headquarters with a gun left behind a manifesto. Have you seen anything on the lame-stream media about his motivation? Have any of the major news networks reported his demands? Nope. And here’s why:
James Lee was a tree-hugging, environmentalist whacko who experienced “awakening” thanks Al Gore’s propaganda. According to his web rants, Lee’s purpose for toting a gun into Discovery was to demand more air-time for global warming and population growth hate speech. In his own words [ed. Emphasis added]:
The Discovery Channel and it’s affiliate channels MUST have daily television programs … where solutions to save the planet would be done. … Focus must be given on how people can live WITHOUT giving birth to more filthy human children since those new additions continue pollution and are pollution.
… [P]rograms encouraging human sterilization and infertility must be pushed.
… [T]alk about ways to disassemble civilization…
… Develop shows that will correct and dismantle the dangerous US world economy.
…All human procreation and farming must cease!
[ed. And here’s my personal favorite] … Nothing is more important than saving [wildlife]. The Lions, Tigers, Giraffes, Elephants, Froggies, Turtles, Apes, Raccoons, Beetles, Ants, Sharks, Bears, and, of course, the Squirrels. The humans? The planet does not need humans.
It goes on and on, but I think you get the idea. So, why would the (big “L”) Liberal media be so conspicuously silent? I know this argument is old and tired, but it’s still true. Let’s put the shoe on the other foot. Let’s say a armed man storms into Discovery Channel HQ demanding that they air more pro-life, anti-abortion programs or more pro-Christian programs. I’m pretty sure that would be headline news for at least a week, maybe more, delving deep into every nook of that man’s past, his evangelical roots, his ring-wing-nut political affiliations.
But what happens when the big news heads happen to agree with the crazy armed man (albeit to a less foaming-mouth crazy degree)? The story dies.
Just my observations and ruminations. Naturally, you have every right to disagree with me.
On a side note, I must give this one bit of praise to the former Mr. Lee. For the first time in my memory, an anti-human-population nut actually “lived it out” and took action to remove his own carbon footprint from Mother Earth (although, he could have saved the police one of their bullets by employing his own). Kudos for practicing what you preach. Now, if the rest of you eco-nut-buckets would follow suit, the rest of us could get on with our lives in peace.
Clicky clicky for the story that prompted this “awakening.”
This week’s white board quip has a pretty funny story behind it. Stephen Hunter was (is?) a movie reviewer for the Washington Post. The following is his review of the movie “Gigli” (pronouced “jee-lee,” widely accepted as the worst movie of the early 21st century).
A month ago, I promised a big announcement. I’ve been hold off until I could get some good pictures, but it seems I can wait no more. After years of dreaming and calculating and praying, I finally did it. I got me a motorcycle.
The Back Story
In all these years, I’ve told myself no. After praying about it and figuring out the money, it just wasn’t right. I even used this as part of a lesson I taught to the youth group about temptation and sin. Frankly, God told me, “No.”
But now, in 2010, we’ve met our goals of A) paying off unsecured debt, B) buying a house, and C) getting the major high-cost jobs on the house done (paying with cash and not credit). And after all that, we still had enough in savings to write a check for Thumper. (You should know by now that I name all my vehicles. Duh!)
I wavered a few times between getting a “cruiser” or a “dual sport.” A cruiser is what you picture in you mind when I say “Harley.” A dual sport is essentially a street legal dirt bike. It’s not nearly as comfortable as a crusier (especially for a passenger), but it can do double duty of getting me to work AND playing in the mud. This is exactly why I own a mountain bike and an SUV. I like to have the option to get dirty.
The Blame
Besides the financial aspect, the real tipping point was a visit to my old buddy Galyn. (If you do a search for his name on this blog, you’ll see I blame him for most of my misadventures.) When I was a kid, my family and Galyn’s family used to go on trips together to ride dirt bikes in the mountains. We have some great shared memories from trips to Tres Ritos, NM, riding some gnarly mountain trails. That was a very very long time ago, but Galyn’s family still goes at least once a year. My family transitioned to horses and if you know me, you know how I feel about that.
Galyn moved out into the sticks a while back, to a housing development that is barely half way built out. He, his wife, and three of their five boys (Yes, he would have his own basketball team if they weren’t all short like him.) go out and ride their motorcycles over the undeveloped area. I finally got to go for a visit, and Galyn put me on his bike to ride around with the boys. The effect was less of a motorcycle fever, and more of a psychotic obsession. I was crushed by a wave of fantastic memories. The matter was settled: Dual sport or nothing.
The very next day, during Sunday school, one of my 8th grade boys (Alex) announced he had bought a dirt bike. I couldn’t contain myself. I launched into a story about the bike trips of my youth, getting my own XR200 for my 12th birthday, and my desire to get back into the sport. After this Alex started sending me links to bikes for sale. One of the first ones he sent was exactly what I was looking for and at a great price. I wrung my hands a bit at the expense, but with lot’s of positive pressure from Tammy and friends, I bit.
The Bike!
Thumper is a Honda XR650L. “XR” means 4-stroke dirt bike. “650” means ~650 cc engine (which is *huge* for the dirt). And “L” means street legal. The engine is three times the size of anything my family ever owned before. It’s heavy and shockingly powerful. In riding to work, I never get above 3rd gear (out of 5). According to the manual, I should shift into 5th gear around 80mph. 80!! God help me if I ever get going that fast on a dirt bike! Yes, it has turn signals, but it’s not a street bike. It feels really ungainly at high speeds.
The down side to buying a dirt bike in DFW in July is that it’s really really hot outside. We just finished a 20+ day stretch of 100+ degree days. When it’s that hot out, riding a bike is just not fun. I did a few rides to work when the weather was less than deadly, but I’ve been really aching for chance to get out on the dirt. There are a few places around the fringes of DFW where you can pay to ride on private land. This week, the heat finally broke and yesterday, in the low 90’s, I jumped on the chance to get dirty.
You knew this was coming, right?
I rode up to Trophy Club Park, near where I work. One perk of a dual sport is no need to haul your bike. Ride to the trail, get dirty, ride home. It was really shaky at first. Let’s face it, it’s been 20 years since I’ve ridden technical trails. (Holy cow! How is that possible?!) But after tooling around on some flat, twisty trails, I started “feelin’ it.” I found a little oval track with jumps in the middle and got a tiny bit of hang time. It felt good. No, it felt amazing.
Then, I started back out onto the longer trails and found a small motorcross track. Ooooh. That looks like fun! I stopped to have a look around before daring to try it. A very large, Cajun fellow rode up on a bike that was much too small for him and he started up a conversation. He said he was trying out a bike he bought for his son, that he was not “cocky” enough to do any of the big jumps, but was enjoying the track. He said he would be more comfortable riding with someone else, just in case. Frankly, so would I. So I mounted up and we did a few laps.
I did a couple of small jumps, but stayed well away from the big monsters. There was a section of whoop-dee-doos. (Click here if you don’t know what whoops are. That’s not me!) I used to really love the whoops when I was a kid, so naturally, I charged on in. But these whoops where a lot bigger than I expected and that big, heavy bike was just more than I could handle. I tried really hard to save it, but to no avail. I dumped Thumper just after the last whoop and hit the ground pretty hard.
After a quick inventory, I decided I was not injured (Hurt, yes. Injured, no.) and the bike was fine. I busted a mirror, but that’s not a big deal. I gave myself a few minutes for the adrenaline to wear off and my head to quit spinning. Then I decided I should head on home. By the time I got to the house, I was aching pretty bad. I had a few scrapes and some deep bruises, the worst on my right knee, but nothing serious. Tammy noticed a dark stain on my jeans. I assumed it was grease, but no. I had bled through my jeans from a small puncture in my right shin. Once cleaned, it turned out to be really small, but deep. This morning, I relented and went to CareNow to check it out.
The doctor said it was deep enough that it will take a while to heal, but small enough that a single stitch would close it. Aw, man. Really?! That just seems pointless and given my aversion (read: “full-on phobia”) of needles, I started negotiating. If it was three or more stitches, I would understand. But one?! Can’t you just tape it up? Yes. A dab of skin glue, a couple of high-tech band-aids and done. Much better! Yes, I’m a wuss. Don’t bother. Tammy has made that abundantly clear.
So, anyway. That’s the big news and the long story and the gritty details. Sorry for stealing a half hour of your life. Just rest assured, I’m fine. No bones sticking out. Lesson learned.
“Woot” (or more properly “w00t”) is an old school gamer term that is an exclamation, a term of excitement, the kind of thing one might shout; thin, pale arms raised; after defeating Count Dracula at the end of Castlevania or Barracoon’s champion spawn in Ultima Online. Woot also a pretty cool website.
On Woot.com, you can buy one item, deeply discounted, for 24 hours. At least that’s how it started. But they’ve now expanded and there are several categories of items to choose from. One of those is t-shirts. Most shirts on shirt.woot.com are too artsy (read “lame”) for my taste, but they do have a few gems. And right now, for some reason, they are doing a sort of competition where many of the designs offered on shirt.woot are available.
All this is to say, I want some shirts!! But I don’t know how long they’ll be for available, and I’m trying to watch my spending until Tammy gets a job. Sooooo, if you really like me (I’ll settle for “you don’t hate me”) and have $15 to spare…
Thumper is a Honda XR650L. “XR” means 4-stroke dirt bike. “650” means ~650 cc engine (which is *huge* for the dirt). And “L” means street legal. The engine is three times the size of anything my family ever owned before. It’s heavy and shockingly powerful. In riding to work, I never get above 3rd gear (out of 5). According to the manual, I should shift into 5th gear around 80mph. 80!! God help me if I ever get going that fast on a dirt bike! Yes, it has turn signals, but it’s not a street bike. It feels really ungainly at high speeds.