Did anyone miss the Oscars last night? I didn’t…. I didn’t watch them, but I sure didn’t miss them.

I did see about 5 minutes of the show while flipping channels. I saw the make-up award recipients make a speech in the aisle (Wha??) and I saw most of Robin William’s “Sponge Bob’s not gay” shtick.

I read some of the news about the show and it sounds like I didn’t miss a thing. It got good ratings, but critics ravaged the show. I did run across a site with video-low-lights and I watched a couple. That was all it took to confirm my suspicion that 3 hours of Hollywood patting its own back is 3 hours I would rather spend plucking out my toe nails with pliers.

I guess I would have been more interested if they had nominated any movie I even had a desire to watch. That’s the only reason I watched the last three years… yeah, I know… I talk way to much about Lord of the Rings, but honestly, that’s the only reason I watched. I don’t even remember who hosted last year.

I will probably leaf through the “worst dressed” magazine features while I’m in line at the grocery store, but other than that, who cares? By the way, do any of my readers actually enjoy listening to Star Jones? I can’t even stand her commercials. Whenever I see her fawning over some self-important hollywood starlet, I think, “Girlfriend! In what box of cracker jacks did she find her back stage pass?”

Oh, and one other thing. Does anyone else think Chris Rock has monkey hands? Weird weird weird.

All links courtesy of Drudge.

Any self-respecting geek should take a stroll down memory lane in this article: The 50 Most Important Games Ever Made. It lists all the greats from 1972 consoles, Atari 2600, Commador 64, and more. Several of my personal favorites are listed.

• Pong
• Space Invaders
• Adventure
• Battle Zone
• Pitfall
• Donkey Kong
• Zork (the original text version)
• Dragon’s Lair
• Gauntlet
• Tetris
• And, of course, Ulitma Online

Wow… I am numb with nostalgia. It would take all day to read all the articles linked here and to consider how different our world would be if it were not for these cultural gems.

Does anyone know where I can find an emulator for pitfall?! I need some time on the vines!!

Via Apropos.

I’ve received some pretty scathing comments on a post I made a few weeks back regarding homosexual men and the risk they pose. I think I’ve been very fair in that I approved all the posts, didn’t delete any of them, and allowed folks to have a voice of decent.

Today, I ran across this little news gem that seems to back up my “intolerant” point of view. The fellow making the news lately with a seemingly stronger form of HIV falls squarely into the demographic I discussed in my previous post. It seems that, before he was hospitalized, he had “drug-fueled, unprotected sex with more than 100 men…”

There’s the full story.

I’m not taking a stance on this “new” HIV, as doctors can’t yet agree if it’s a new strain or if this guy’s life style left his immune system weaker than normal. All I’m saying is that, as I stated before, there are those in the homosexual community who, by their very lifestyle, endanger other people. Thus, my argument that homosexuality is not harmless even though mass media would have us believe that the gay lifestyle is totally normal and harmless, just … more colorful.

Call me intolerant. That’s fine. I’m a follower of Christ, and He was anything but tolerant. Christ tolerated people but he did not tolerate their sinful lifestyles.

He would have dinner with the tax collectors, but rest assured the dinner conversation centered around their need to come clean of their dishonest lifestyles. He forgave the prostitute, but with that He told her, “Go and sin no more,” not, “Go and remember to use a condom.” And most notably, He had no tolerance for hypocritical religious leaders who where, in his words, “white-washed tombs”, putting forth righteous facades, but living self-centered, prideful, and greedy lives. I don’t pretend to be perfect or righteous. I make no secret of the fact that I am a sinner and I struggle with my inborn desires. But that does not mean that I am blind to the sins of others. That does not make me any less capable of holding others accountable for dangerous lifestyles.

I would not ostracize people because of their sexual choices any more than I would ostracize someone for being an alcoholic or a Jehovah’s Witness (Yeah, I know. I’m just asking for flaming comments now.) God loves everyone, and so I must follow that example. But God is clear that, despite His love, He can not tolerate sin. He has given us an option, through grace, to escape our sin and follow Him, but it is up to us individually to accept that grace. If you are homosexual, I love you as a human being, created in God’s image, but I must disapprove of your sinful choices, just as you, if you are a Christian, would have to disapprove of my pride or lust or whatever weakness I may have.

What I’m getting at here is simply this: Sin is sin and the first step to living a Christ centered life is to recognize sin for what it is, then turn away from it. I’m not a gay-basher. People who go out looking for gay men to beat to death are guilty of murder and hate and will be judged for that. People who say every homosexual is going to hell have no understanding of grace and forgiveness, and their pride will be judged. The sin of the Pharisees was no better and no worse than the sin of the prostitute. I acknowledge the fact that my occasional lie or pride or lust is no better and no worse than the man in the story above. The difference is that I have given my life to Christ and He has forgiven my sin, so that I can strive to live a life free from sin. (Notice I said “strive.” No one is perfect.) That man has the same option. He can turn his life around, come clean and be welcomed into God’s arms when the dies. Or, he can continue to live in rebellion and pay a very dire, eternal consequence.

You don’t have to agree with me. That’s God’s other unique gift to mankind; free will. The comments are open. Be gentle.

Steve over at The Sneeze has hosted a very interesting discussion on responses to trite greetings, such as “What’s up?”

This got me thinking. There are so many strange phrases that the English speaking world uses to welcome acquaintances. Why is that? Do other cultures have this odd practice? Are there French equivalents to these greetings?

“What’s up?”
“How are you?”
“Kay-Pasa?”
“What’s going down?”
“How’s it hangin’?”

This line of thought quickly leads to the obvious question: Is Michael Jackson a victim of his environment or just plain loony? But that’s not what I’m going to talk about.

Instead, I would like to discuss the virtues of “clever” responses to these bizarre greetings.

My dad is the king of “clever” come-backs. (Notice I use quotes around clever. That’s because the real wittiness is up for debate.) For years growing up, I honestly believed that “Better than I deserve” was a common and valid response to “How are you doing?” It was not until I became a cynical teenager that I realized that my dad was pretty nerdy. Another of his favorite replies is “Terrible!”

How should one respond to “How are you?” Often, saying “Fine.” is a blatant lie. So, be honest. The truth shall set you free. In this case, it will set you free of shallow co-workers who ask questions they really don’t want the answer to.

“How are you, today?”
“Well, my toe nail fungus is getting better, but my socks still smell like a hobo’s boxer shorts.”

“How’s it going?”
“What? My diarrhea? Oh, it’s going alright.”

“What’s up?”
“My nipples! When are they going to fix the heater in the place?!”

Simply apply this honesty principle and see if you ever get asked such silly questions again! Then again, you’ll never be asked out on a date either, but hey, social interaction is over rated anyway, right?

There is another school of thought that assumes the best response to a pointless question is an equally pointless answer. I must admit I dabble in this method from time to time.

“How are you, today?”
“3.1415926535… should I go on?”

“How’s it going?”
“Indeed.”

“What’s up?”
“‘Up’ is an adjective, adverb, noun, verb and preposition depending on context. Let me know if you need any more linguistic advice.”

“Que pasa?”
“Ceñirse a Ingles, tonto gringo.”

“How’s it hangin’?”
“I would tell you, but it might make you nauseous.”

“What’s goin’ down?”
“Let’s keep our love lives to ourselves, okay?”

Ultimately, any “good” response will leave no doubt about the geek score of the responder.

The comment section is open for business. I fully expect this to my most commented post ever.

CAUTION: The following review is rife with conversational ramblings and far too much personal information that have nothing to do with the movie being reviewed. You have been warned.

At this years super bowl party, Tammy won the pool (the betting kind, not the chlorine kind) and came away with a gift card to Blockbuster Video. (Tammy has a knack for winning things that really bothers me, as I am a student of math and probability which she somehow always outwits. But that’s a story for another day.)

I’m not fond of Blockbuster. I appreciate that, as a company, they do what they can to help out family values, such as refusing to offer NC-17 movies. But on the other hand, I’m cheap and renting at Blockbuster isn’t. We don’t have a membership at Blockbuster, so what the heck were we going to do with the gift card. We finally made a trip into the store to see what we could barter. They had a sale going on pre-viewed DVDs and we bought three.

I’m also not fond of buying movies. I don’t watch movies often, and I certainly have no need to own a movie unless it’s something I might invite friends over to watch, like LOTR. It has to be a really great movie for me to want to buy it.

Tammy likes to buy movies. Nothing wrong with that. She likes to watch movies that she enjoys and often spends a rainy Saturday watching a feel-good flick that she’s seen a dozen times. It’s logical and I don’t hold it against her. Sometimes she wants to buy something because she’s heard it’s good, even if she hasn’t seen it. Such was the case with “Dodgeball”. We’d heard the youth kids going on about it and decided, “What the heck. It’s basically free anyway.”

Okay… now to the actual review.

The kids were wrong. This movie sucked.

I have said before that I like Ben Stiller‘s comedic style. I have to qualify that statment now. I like Ben Stiller’s average guy that can’t get a break style, made famous by “Meet the Parents”. I really hate his “Zoolander” type comedy. It’s dumb. Not “Dumb and Dumber” dumb. It’s dumb like that guy in your office who thinks he’s really funny and always does that same little joke, accent, or quip that wasn’t really funny to anybody but him the first time but he keeps doing it anyway dumb. It’s not funny and it’s annoying that he thinks it is funny. “Dodgeball” is “that guy”.

The story is fun enough. A lazy, fun loving, warm hearted guy runs a shabby fitness gym populated by all manner of social out casts. Across the street, Stiller’s character runs a huge, high dollar, trendy fitness club. Let the trite plot line begin. The protagonist, played by Vince Vaughn, is going to lose his gym to the snobbish yet stupid antagonist, Stiller, unless he can come up with a load of cash. Low and behold, there’s a national dodgeball tournament coming up and the prize money is, to the penny, the amount he needs to save his gym. I’m sure you can figure out the rest of the movie. (I have a feeling a chimp with a brain tumor could figure it out.)

There were a handful of jokes that did get me to laugh out loud, simply because they were so far out in left field. (“If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball… CLANG!”) But the minutes (which seemed like hours) in between those few jokes were not just not funny, they were border-line insulting. Am I really expected to laugh at a redneck lusting after a male cheerleader wannabe while he wash’s the redneck’s big ol’ 4×4? That’s not funny. That’s disturbing. And please, please, please, someone tell Hollywood that there is nothing funny about a geriatric with a bondage fetish. Ick.

One out of a possible five grins. ‘Nuff said.

Yet another off-the-wall quip from “The Happy Happy Joy Joy Song” of Ren and Stimpy fame

“The little critters of nature… They don’t know that they’re ugly.”

I found this article on agapepress.org this morning. Wow. Please take a few minutes to read it.

Our brave soldiers, and the rest of the world, are getting a horribly jaded view of the war in Iraq from American media. Thank God that the majority of Americans are not buying in to the liberal media’s hateful spin.

In brief, a wounded Marine called in to a talk radio show to share how he and his comrades were scared to death about the reception they would get in the U.S. based on the media coverage they were seeing in the hospital. They honestly believed that they would face the same persecution that Viet Nam vets came home to.

We saw what the media was saying about what’s going on, and we were worried about what we were actually going to face when we came home. We didn’t know what to expect, to be honest with you. From the news media we were seeing, the whole country was basically telling us we’re a bunch of jerks.
…
What’s going to happen? What will we be facing? Is it going to be like the Vietnam era, are there going to be people spitting at us?

Fortunately, he didn’t come home to insults and protests. He came home to an airport full of grateful applause (a month before the super bowl commercial).

If you know a soldier, let them know that America loves them for what their doing. If you don’t know a soldier, you can find one.

(P.S. If you run into any Viet Nam vets, tell them you love them too, and apologize for the crap the hippy generation morons put them through. Funny, that’s the same group of people who are running the current media smear campaign.)

Well, let’s see what else can go wrong.

Last week, if you recall, I had a bout of insomnia. I’m quite sure this lead to me coming down with a nasty cold on Monday; sinus rebellion, fever, and general nastiness. I stayed home from work on Tuesday and tried to sleep it off. I also missed the first practice for the church’s spring musical. Wednesday, I went to work with less fever, but I was still quite loopy and mentally unfocused. Today, I have no fever, but for some reason, I’m still very groggy and unfocused. Honestly, I feel like I’m drunk, but I’m not even medicated, so there’s no good reason for it.

While at work on Wednesday, my PC freaked out again and kept me from getting any work done all day. It’s been slowing dying for a few weeks now, and keeping the new network administrators on their toes all the while. They finally threw in the towel and started build a new computer for me.

Today I received said computer and started setting it up for my needs, installing this and that. In the mist of my installs, the video card puked. Another hour lost. I finally got to get some work done this afternoon. Once caught up, I thought I’d check on the blog. Well, what do you know, I can’t log in. Grrr.

Keep in mind, I’m still only half here mentally. This cold still has my brain working on auxiliary power for some reason. So, I decided there must be something wrong with my installation of WordPress. I went ahead and upgraded my install to the latest version available on Fantastico (the service BlueHost uses to provide nice applications like WordPress).

This did not fix my log in problem, but did do a nice job of overwriting all my style changes. I was able to strong-arm the database for WordPress to get my password fixed and get me logged back in. I was also able to find an old back-up of my CSS files and PHP template, although these back-ups do not have the latest and greatest. I am still missing my WBQotW on the menu. I’m hoping I can find a newer version of my template at home, maybe in my browser cache.

I had hoped to make a couple of posts about current events in the news, but now I’ve eaten up what time I had left today. Now, I have to get home and get to spring musical rehearsal. I just hope I don’t get pulled over, because I’m fairly sure I would fail a field sobriety test.

*sigh*

I’m so excited about the new theatrical version of “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”. The new trailer is on Amazon.com.

Check it out.

I have to be honest. I never finished reading the book. But I did listen to the entire 13 hour BBC Radio version.

How often do you dig through your old emails archives? I don’t do it enough, it would seem. I got rid of almost half of my old saved emails today, almost all of them pertained to past events or projects long dead and buried.

In the process I found a bunch of really great net jokes that I kept, but never forwarded on. (You can thank me later.) Still, they are funny. So instead of forcing jokes down your … inbox, I’ll post them here where you can ignore them so much easier.

…
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
…
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poke me in the ribs and cackle, saying, “You’re next.” They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
…

More to come later.