No, this is not about the importance of legal planning for end of life care. (Although that is important.)

This is the living will for my own blog.  More specifically, my blog videos (such as Work From Home Friday Videos).

I, Trint, being of sound mind and body, as sole proprietor of Surely You’re Not Serious, do make the following request: If my videos ever get as bad as the video below, someone please pull the plug and do not resuscitate!

Unfortunately, this does not get any funnier after about the first 30 seconds like the real “bad music” classics, but… Me oh my, it’s so bad I was crying!

P.S. This guy has a whole channel of similarly bad videos.

This week’s white board quip has me thinking about food and fat.

That’s the problem with sweatpants.

I don’t even know where I heard that one. (But isn’t it just a perfect fit for the white board?!) As soon as I saw it in my queue, though, I knew it was the right quip for this week because I feel very much like switching to sweat pants for my office attire.

Despite my insistence that holiday food “doesn’t count,” my weight has been steadily increasing. I’ve almost completely erased my Weight Watchers success from a couple of years ago. It looks like I’ll be punishing myself with another diet… after the holidays, of course.

Ahh, junior high band concerts. Great times. Great memories. Great googly-moogly, that sounds horrid!

If you hate your dog and/or your ear drums, crank your volume up to eleven for this one!!

The 2010 U.S. Census is here and there are lots and lots of bad people out there who will use it as an avenue to rip you off, or worse.

This us pulled verbatim from Snopes:

Since the first phase of the 2010 U.S. Census is already underway, reminders about how to ensure you provide information only to official Census Bureau representatives – and provide only the types of information they are authorized to collect – are especially timely. The web site of the Better Business Bureau (BBB) offers some good advice on this topic:

• If a U.S. Census worker knocks on your door, they will have a badge, a handheld device, a Census Bureau canvas bag and a confidentiality notice. Ask to see their identification and their badge before answering their questions. However, you should never invite anyone you don’t know into your home.
• Census workers are currently only knocking on doors to verify address information. Do not give your Social Security number, credit card or banking information to anyone, even if they claim they need it for the U.S. Census. While the Census Bureau might ask for basic financial information, such as a salary range, it will not ask for Social Security, bank account or credit card numbers, nor will employees solicit donations.
• Eventually, Census workers may contact you by telephone, mail or in person at home. However, they will not contact you by e-mail, so be on the look out for e-mail scams impersonating the Census. Never click on a link or open any attachments in an e-mail that are supposedly from the U.S. Census Bureau.

This is just one small example of why I so dislike the United Nations (the “Un”): Un-Speak.

To accomplish the Un-goals of the Un-Security Counsel and the Un-General Assembly, Un-Speak is all about being completely Un-offensive (and thus  Un-effective) in whatever you have to say.

Regarding the tensions with Libya over the release and glorification of the Lockerbie Bomber, this quote is from U.S. envoy to the Un, Susan Rice. (Emphasis added.)

“How President Gaddafi chooses to comport himself, when he attends the General Assembly and the Security Council in New York, has the potential either to further aggravate those feelings and emotions or not.”

He “has the potential” to make people mad “or not.” Gee, ya think? That’s like saying, “That is the ugliest baby I have ever seen in my entire life or not.”

Actually, the more I think about this, it could come in handy. It could allow me to say more of the tactless things I really want to say without all the weepy backlash.

“Wow! You really let yourself go or not. You must be over 200 pounds or not.”

“You drive like a complete idiot or not. You might be missing a chromosome or not.”

“You are the worst parent I’ve ever seen or not. If you don’t do something about your kid running around the restaurant, screaming, I’m going to strangle him first, then you or not.”

…

As a footnote to this post, the quote above was little more than a footnote to the article which is really about the Bronco Bomber getting in bed with the Un. (Actually more like getting in bed on top of…) (Again, emphasis added.)

Barack Obama will cement the new co-operative relationship between the US and the United Nations this month when he becomes the first American president to chair its 15-member Security Council.

This should really throw some gas on the whole Anti-Christ conspiracy theory. I prefer to stay out of the Bronco/Anti-Christ conversation. The way I see it, the Anti-Christ is coming and there’s not a darn thing we can do to stop it (or bring it). So I don’t really care that Obama is the Anti-Christ OR NOT.

I’ve been waiting for this day for over a decade.

I remember vividly when the very first “Super Walmart” opened in Amarillo in the late 1990’s. They had groceries and they were open 24 hours. Back then, the only things open 24 hours in Amarillo were a few gas stations and the Waffle House. (Come to think of it, excluding Walmart, that may still be true.)

I also vividly remember my first, late-night visit. It was just after 2 AM. I waited in the car while some friends ran in for some late-night essentials. (It wasn’t booze, and other than that, I can’t think of anything that qualifies as a “late-night essential”, but still…)

My eyes grew wide in amazement at the circus of mulleted, flip-flop clad, beer-gutted wonders strolling in and out of the store with their late-night essentials. (This time, yes, I mean booze.) Since then, this day has been an inevitability.

It has come: People of Walmart, the photo blog. Check it out. And, if you catch one of those rare creatures, be sure you have your camera handy so you can submit your own siting.

That’s right, kiddies! So if you’ve got something on your mind that you’ve been dying to tell your significant other, but you’ve been hesitant because you know it will cause a massive fight, today’s the day!! Be sure to air out all that dirty laundry today so that tomorrow you can celebrate Kiss and Make Up Day with flair!!

I hope and pray that there is a special place in hell for the people who thought this was a good idea:

#1 – These pre-lit Christmas trees look like they came from the Skittles factory. Blue, purple, yellow, orange, red and even black!

#2 – It’s FREAKING AUGUST!! Garden Ridge has all of their Christmas decorations on sale (including some of the most God-aweful inflatable blasphame) and it’s FREAKING AUGUST!!!

This is golden! Every church youth, parent, and church staff member should watch this video. We are the Youth Mini-Starz! WORD!

Thanks, Scott H., for sending this on! (Psst. Scott is a youth mini-star!)

My Aunt Jill posted this to Facebook. Now, I don’t usually do these things. They’re long, time consuming, and seriously narcissistic. But this one’s pretty clever and… It’s Aunt Jill, so it’s gotta be cool, right?!

I am very guilty of filling out the ubiquitous facebook list of questions, because, well, who doesn’t like to talk (write) about themselves? But many of these questions are somewhat silly and boring, so I decided to make Jill’s quiz. I challenge all 65 of my facebook friends (Not just the ones that always do these, but the rest of you too!!) to fill it out and post it AND add a question (and answer!) not on there. Ready, set, go!!

Jill’s quiz

1. Favorite word: (This is tough!) Auspicious

2. Worst hair style: The bowl cut I had at ages 0 through 12.

3. First movie that scared you: Jaws. That scene where the dead guy pokes his head out of the hole in the boat. Gheh… still makes me squirm.

4. Favorite quote: Are you kidding me? I’ve got over 400 white board quips. You can’t expect me to have a favorite! How about:
“If God had meant people to run around naked, they’d be born that way!”

5. First big purchase: Well, I did just by a house, but… Probably the $400 Canon Rebel G 35mm camera I bought in Colorado.

6. Best place you ever lived: Colorado Springs!!

7. Most people think you are… Either mildly retarded or really goofy.

8. A surprising book you have read: Surprising because I read it, or the book itself is surprising?? Hmm. How about Stephen King’s “Misery.” It was the first of his books I read and so much more shocking than the movie. She didn’t use a hammer on his foot, people. It was an AXE!!

9. Favorite costume you ever wore: Backwards man. It was the last Halloween on which I actually trick-or-treated… in college… I was 20. *shame*

10. If you could change anything about your home, what would it be? I just moved in! I’ve only just begun to change things!!

11. Funniest thing my kid ever said: “Dude! We should tap-dance!” (Yes, Kason, you are one of my many “chi’ren.”)

12. If I was invited to the Oscars, and my significant other couldn’t go, I would go with: How could I say anything but Drew Barrymore?!

13. Brush with celebrity: Cowboys running-back Tony Dorsett, in a gas station bathroom in Dallas when I was 16 and on my first solo road trip.

14. Most surprising skill: I can jump rope and hula-hoop like a pro. (Thanks public school phys-ed.)

15. Favorite thing on your walls: Real theater movie posters from all three Lord of the Rings movies. (Although technically, they’re only leaning against my wall at the moment.)

16. Most frequent (or favorite) vacation spot: Aspen, CO. Only stayed the night once, but made many drives over Indy Pass when we lived in the Springs.

17. Why do you do the job you do? Alt-N has the best culture of any company I’ve worked for (or heard of for that matter). I love figuring out difficult problems and making the website do amazing things. Plus, the better I do my job, the more money the company makes and the more fun stuff we all get to do. (Lake party!!)

18. If you could have a talent you don’t have, what would it be? There are talents I don’t have?! Seriously though, I want be able to play anything I want on the guitar.

19. What decision changed your life? Deciding to move to Colorado Springs and “start over.”

20. One word or phrase that says something about you in each time period that applies — Teens: Stupid, 20’s: Adventurous 30’s: Blessed, 40’s: I’ll have to get back to you on that.

21. Best birthday: 12th when I got my own motorcycle. (Living in the country has its perks!)

22. Best present: Well, there was that motorcycle. But probably the picture frame filled with pictures of a bunch of my “chi’ren” that I got last year. (Thanks, Katie!)

23. Most interesting thing about my siblings is: Sabra is a college professor! She doesn’t seem to like it much, but I think it’s awesome!

24. Place you want to go: Ireland.

25. What would you change about your life? Many times I think about how different my life would be if I hadn’t made so many stupid mistakes when I was young. But, those mistakes led me to where I am and I am very happy. So, I guess, nothing. No! Wait! Washboard abs! YEAH!

Don’t forget to add your own question and answer.
26. Worst mistake you ever made: Getting physically involved with my high school girlfriend… then marrying her out of guilt. Worst three years of my life!